A Shocking Final Four

By Les Truthly, United Fake News (UFN)
March 25, 2020—Sioux Falls, SD

Will Cinderella Stay until the Last Dance?

Outside the Frostbite Dome in Sioux Falls, folks are expecting a cold front to blow through tonight. No doubt, the Villanova faithful wish it could have come in a little quicker. It might have cooled down the couldn’t-miss shooting of the Wichita State Shockers. But there was nothing cold about the hoopsters from Wichita State; their hot hands from both inside and three-point range tamed the #3-seeded Wildcats, 90-74. For only the second time in INCAA tournament history, a play-in team has made it to the Final Four. Now the only question is how far the Cinderella Shockers can take their astonishing winning streak. To keep the drive alive, they’ll have to take down the second-seeded San Diego State Aztecs in their semifinal matchup, two days from now. It’s a tall order, but the Shockers are on a four-game tear, having bested a #4 seed (Ohio State), a #3 seed (Villanova), and a #1 seed (Dayton) on their way from outside the bracket to the Big Dance.

Turning to the South Region, midway through the season most pundits thought Virginia was a bubble team, unlikely to return to the tournament. But in their Sweet Sixteen game against Florida State, with whom they split results during the regular season, they found a way to make the points they needed. They also handed out a few heart attacks along the way, coming from behind in the fashion that seems to be a Cavalier trademark. And by the way: What is it about Virginia, overtime, and teams from Texas? Last year, they bested the scrappy Red Raiders from Texas Tech in the extra period, and this year, the #1-seeded Baylor Bears fell into the Cavalier trap, losing 72-79 in an overtime in which the Virginia team could do no wrong. Next up for the Cavs is Kansas, the top-ranked team in the tournament. Will Virginia engineer yet another come-from-behind, cardiac closer? We’ll find out in the next round when the two squads tip off at center court in the Frostbite Dome.

I caught up with Imaginary National Collegiate Athletics Association President and CEO, Gordon “Smiley” Bernhardt, as he was congratulating the Cavalier players and coaches after their upset win over Baylor. I asked his opinion of the chances for anyone out there maintaining a perfect bracket, given all the favored teams who have fallen to upstarts in this year’s tourney. “This is why we play the games,” Bernhardt said. “And that’s the great thing about the INCAA Tournament; an outsider team that is playing well can beat the #1 seed and become champion. It’s like Sir Charles Barkley once told me: ‘The court is the same length for every game, the basket is ten feet in height for everybody.’”

Looking ahead to the championship game… Will it be an all-Kansas show, with the dark-horse Shockers taking on their top-ranked, highly favored in-state rivals, the Jayhawks? Will Virginia pull off yet another upset, toppling Kansas? Could the final be a matchup between #1 Kansas and #2 San Diego State? In a tournament with as many surprises as this one has had so far, it seems like anything can happen—and probably will.